Being a Working Mom in France and the U.S.

Here is an article I wrote a couple of months ago for Working Mother about cultural differences for working mothers between France and the USA:

France and the United States are supposed to be similar Western countries. But having worked full time in both countries as a mom of four, I have noticed a lot of differences. For sure, there are advantages and disadvantages on both sides. The main variation, though: France has better social benefits while the American organization of life is easier for working moms. Here’s what I mean.

French Perks You Probably Didn’t Know About

1. Every working mom (even if she started her job only one month beforehand) is guaranteed at least 16 weeks paid maternity leave for the first two children—six weeks before the birth and 10 weeks after—26 weeks for the third child and beyond and 34 weeks for any set of twins.

2. Moms can request a high-quality public childcare spot and pay according to their income. There are not enough spots for every child, but if you don’t obtain a spot, you can still hire a government-subsidized nanny, at her home with other babies or even at your home only for your child. These nannies are very regularly controlled and benefit from standard trainings.

3. What is also remarkable is that every child can begin free public school at 3 and can ask (and sometimes obtain) a spot at 2-and-a-half. The education is high-quality and preschool-like for two years. Kids learn to socialize, and they also learn some basic academic skills. (In the U.S., I had asked for a preschool spot for my 4-year-old at the local public school and was told that our income was “too high.”)

4. At “school cafeteria,” kids can eat a family-style, three-course hot meal every day. They can’t bring their own lunch. Some kids go back home for lunchtime, especially when one of the parents doesn’t work, but most of them do not. U.S. cafeteria lunch isn’t nearly as good, and preparing my kids’ lunch every single school day is a hassle.

5. Depending on parents’ income, number of children and other factors, families might qualify for a government bonus to buy school supplies at the beginning of the school year, other monthly aids (called “allocations familiales”) and even housing funds. School lunches and after-school programs are also subsidized for some families. And for many public expenses, the more kids you have, the less you pay for each of them.

6. Every child can take advantage of quality after-school care and homework aid for a very low price, based on the parents’ income. Same thing goes for Wednesdays when kids don’t go to school while parents work.

7. Recess lasts for two hours a day. The school day is longer as a result, but the mid-day break helps kids expend their energy and make friends.

8. There are far fewer school and PTA meetings. This saves a lot of time.

9. The retirement age limit lowers when you have kids (under some conditions). Generally, having kids is considered as working for the good of the whole nation.

10. Workers get five weeks of vacation and between 10 and 20 days (depending of your industry) of reduced hours, or RTT (“reduction du temps de travail,” which started in early 2000s to reduce the official weekly working time down to 35 hours).

11. People actually take their 45-minute to one-hour lunch almost every day and leave the workplace.

12. Some companies have their own subsidized cafeterias, and others share cafeterias with outside companies. And if your company doesn’t have a cafeteria, you have subsidized restaurant checks for your lunch.

13. Colleagues take coffee breaks together twice a day: in the morning and after lunch, in the office. It’s a good time to socialize and unofficially discuss collaborative work concerns.

14. Elementary-school kids can choose and practice several activities at the same time, as each one usually requires only one event to participate in a week. That lets them discover different activities and decide which ones they eventually want to continue at a higher level. Sports, art and other extracurriculars are more time-consuming in the U.S. because kids are supposed to practice at least twice a week.

15. Children are more independent. You can drop your kids off at birthday parties; no need to stay with them. Same at home and at the playground—I don’t feel like I have to be with them all the time. And I don’t have to be as involved with school projects or homework. It’s quite a different expectation in the U.S.

American Perks You Probably Take for Granted

1. Businesses’ operating hours in the U.S. are allies of working moms. Many grocery stores are open 24/7, and a lot of libraries and other public places are open on weekends and late in the evening. In France, you cannot find an open grocery store on Sunday, and most public places are closed on Saturdays and Sundays. On our first weekend back in France after a year in the U.S., the grocery was closed when we arrived for shopping in the evening. We ended up ordering a pizza!

2. Speaking of, almost every American restaurant offers catering and take-away services, which is not true in France.

3. You can access more public services online. And if you buy something online in France, you have to spend half of your Saturday morning at the post office to receive your package!

4. School buses are a relief. With the exception of some schools located deep in the deep countryside, there are no school buses in France. And when you have kids in different schools like I did, you have to rush from one school to the other through the traffic jam twice a day. This is exhausting.

5. Working hours can also vary a lot in France, whereas it’s normal for American moms to leave at 5 p.m.. French employees don’t tend to leave work before 6 p.m., and for some, not before 7 p.m. It’s not easy to spend time with your kids after that.

6. There are fewer strikes that affect working parents in the U.S. In France, though, there are a lot. Working moms have to worry about both where to leave their kids on those days (if you’re lucky, you have family members who can watch them, otherwise you might have to take a sick day, and figure out alternative transportation because public servants strike at the same time).

It’d be simplistic to say that things are way better in France or in the U.S. The truth is, it all depends on what your needs and habits are.